Life is so unpredictable! One day everything is well and the next second your life spins 180 degrees and you end up in a completely new, unfamiliar, and scary position. And have to live and see life through a different angle.
It all started a little over a month ago when what I thought I had muscle soreness from exercisizing a lot on a daily basis( vinyasa yoga, pilates, boot camp, running, biking). There was no amount of Tiger Balm, Icy Hot or Capsaicin that would make my pain go away and I ended up at the Emergency Room.
It turns out apparently I have Costochondrial Separation, what pretty much means my cartilage separated and unattached from my rib bones! Ouch! Rest, rib brace, and NO exercise or lifting of any kind allowed…up to 6 months to fully recover. Apparently this injury is common in atlethes that play tennis, golf or martial arts.
Didn’t even know such thing was possible!
I was having a hard time finding an specialist and in so much pain.
And then my beloved grandma, my Piccolla Nona, ended up in the hospital close to death in Brazil, for the third time this year.
So I didn’t think twice and hopped in a plane the next day to come and be with her. I should’t say hopped, it was more like I had Special Assistance to fly here, wheel chair and all. And I realized how hard is the life of a disabled person.
I started to see everything differently. All the little beautiful parts of our bodies that we take for granted. They all have their very important role , and I am so blessed and grateful for being healthy.
And how important it is to let go of all resentment and forgive those who we love today, because we don’t know how much longer they/us will be here. You see, my grandmother and I had a disagreement a while ago and were not really talking much for the past couple of years.
Anyways, I am here, in Brazil now, spending time with my grandma everyday, and it just feells like nothing ever happened between us, love is so much stronger than anything else!
And I am going to doctors, doing all kinds of exams to figure out what I have and which treatment I should follow.
I wanted to share this because I can say this past month has changed me enormously. It made me see life in a completely different way.
I am not going to say or do tomorrow what I can say or do today.
I am thankful for everything I am and all the people that are part of my life.
I welcome change. Buddishm calls it it Impermanence – all things change, life changes continously.
Just like a song by brazilian 80′s rock band Legiao Urbana says ” E preciso amar as pessoas como se nao houvesse amanha. Porque se voce parar pra pensar, na verdade nao ha.” Or – We need to love people as if there would be no tomorrow. Because if you stop and think, in reality, there is no tomorrow.
I would like to end this very serious and reflective post with a quote by Pema Chodron on Impermanence:
” That nothing is static or fixed, that all is fleeting and impermanent, it is the first mark of existence. It is the ordinary state of affairs. Everything is in process. Everything -every tree, every blade of grass, all the animals, insects, human beings, buildings, the animate and the inanimate – is always changing, moment to moment. “